Life in a Pinball Machine
Thoughts on the past and plotting a way forward . . .This week includes another birthday and the end of a year that has been beyond anything we could have imagined. In my own way, I take stock.
I’m at a fortunate stage of life—a time when I have decades of memories to sort through. Like a Tree of Life spread of Tarot cards, each memory can be shuffled, rearranged, and examined to help me understand the wealth of events that comprise my life so far—and can guide me in how I want to live the fewer years ahead.
In every life there are losses—people who rambled in and made an appearance before catching the next bus out of town, irreplaceable and tragic losses of those most dear, people who were important for years and then they (or I) moved off in another direction to follow another lifestyle, another interest. We are all travelers on this crazy, beautiful earth—like marbles in a pinball machine we ricochet around, make contacts, lunge forward, fall back. We weave in and out of each other’s lives. Even when someone special was just passing through, it is so much better (although bittersweet) to have had them as a traveling companion at least for awhile. Each person leaves an imprint behind, like a thumb pressing into warm flesh, hopefully not leaving a bruise but, instead, a warm memory still felt after all the years have passed.
As I think about what comes next, I gain suggestions from my past, clues about what worked, what didn’t, and what is unfinished. Certain threads have been constant, returned to again and again: my children, some family members and best friends, my interest in books, art, rock and roll, dancing on the edge of adventure, and taking on new challenges. My mantra for the coming days comes from a John Mellancamp interview on CBS Sunday Morning, my all-time favorite TV program. Mellancamp, puffing on a cigarette and looking at times like he’s been rode hard and put away wet, says in his signature gravelly voice:
I’m 65 years old. I can see the finish line from here. . . It's my duty and job to not waste any more summers, and try to learn something every day, to try to create something every day, make something every day—
The Sun card shown here portends good fortune, happiness, joy and harmony. It represents the universe coming together and agreeing with your path and aiding forward movement into something greater. I can’t think of a better way to greet the future!
